Once upon a time there was a shepherd looking after his sheep on the edge of a deserted road. Suddenly a brand newJeep Cherokee screeches to a halt next to him. The driver, a young man dressed in a Brioni suit, Cerrutti shoes, Ray-Ban glasses and a YSL tie, gets out and asks the shepherd, "If I guess how many sheep you have, will you give one of them to me?"
The shepherd looks at the young man, then looks at the sheep which are grazing beyond and says "All right".
The young man parks the car, connects his notebook to his mobile, enters a NASA site, scans the ground using his GPS, opens a data base and 60 Excel tables filled with algorithms, then prints a 150 page report on his high-tech mini-printer.
He then turns to the shepherd and says: "You have exactly 1,586 sheep here."
The shepherd answers: "That's correct, you can have your sheep."
The young man takes the sheep and puts it in the back of his jeep.
The shepherd looks at the young man and asks: "If I guess your profession, will you return my sheep to me?"
The young man answers: "Yes, why not?"
The shepherd says: "You are a management consultant".
"How did you know?" asks the young man.
"Very simple," answers the shepherd. "First you come here without being called. Second, you charge me a sheep to tell me something I already know. Third, you do not understand anything about what I do, because you took my dog."
There is more truth than poetry in some of these sayings:
The reason a dog has so many friends is that he wags his tail instead of his tongue.
Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful.
If there are no dogs in Heaven, then when I die I want to go where they went.
There is no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking your face.
A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than he loves himself.
The average dog is a nicer person than the average person.
We give dogs time we can spare, space we can spare and love we can spare. And in return, dogs give us their all. It's the best deal man has ever made.
Dogs love their friends and bite their enemies, quite unlike people, who are incapable of pure love and always have to mix love and hate.
I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult.
A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three times before lying down.
Anybody who doesn't know what soap tastes like never washed a dog.
-Franklin P. Jones
If I have any beliefs about immortality, it is that certain dogs I have known will go to heaven, and very, very few persons.
If your dog is fat, you aren't getting enough exercise
My dog is worried about the economy because Alpo is up to $3.00 a can. That's almost $21.00 in dog money.
Ever consider what our dogs must think of us? I mean, here we come from a grocery store with the most amazing haul, chicken, pork, half a cow. They must think we're the greatest hunters on earth!
Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.
-Robert A. Heinlein
If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you; that is the principal difference between a dog and a man.
You can say any foolish thing to a dog, and the dog will give you a look that says, 'Wow, you're right! I never would've thought of that!'
- Dave Barry
Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole.
If you think dogs can't count, try putting three dog biscuits in your pocket and then give him only two of them.
My goal in life is to be as good a person as my dog thinks I am.
"One of the hardest things in life to learn is which bridge to
cross and which bridge to burn"